Extinguishment observations

Related discussions

• Contrary/Extinguishment discussion
• Functional Breakdown-- Quasi-Identical and Extinguishment
• EII-EIE extinguishment relations (INFj-ENFj)
• ILEs what do you think of ILIs? ILE-ILI contrary relations
• IEI-IEE extinguishment relations (contrary INFp & ENFp)
• SEI-SEE extinguishment/contrary relations (ISFp & ESFp)

ESI-ESE Contrary Relations

Friendship between people of these types is common. It begins almost immediately. After discussing all the mundane sensory topics in a circle of mutual friends (where can one get something at a discount, what's the best recipe for cooking a chicken) some part of the conversation will be dedicated to the more intimate, personal topics. Once both the ESI and the ESE open up before each other and talk about what is happening in their personal lives, then it is quite possible that they will strike up a friendship. If the ESI hasn't stopped communicating with the ESE after hearing about the details of his or her personal life, then it may be said that ESE's actions have been approved of, which is affirming and pleasant for the ESE. ESI talks about the details of his private life only with his close friends, and even then, if they are lucky, so if this 'luck' has befallen to the ESE it is a significant gesture.

Their friendship is usually even-tempered with many exciting meetings. ESE likes that the ESI is always balanced, diplomatic, and that he clearly knows where he stands and about how to conduct his life. ESI enjoys the 'brightness' of ESE, his extraversion and optimism, his active (perhaps brave) and open approach to life by which he draws out his introverted friend.

Most of the topics of their conversation center around the topic of relationships, starting from their personal liaisons and romances to what is happening in their family and close circle of friends. Both of them are interested in learning about of what can happen, hoping that another's experience can help them make better decisions in life.

However if they spend a lot of time together, the differences in their ways of relating and evaluating relationships become clear. ESI holds on to his principles and frameworks of behavior, to his internal sense of correctness, while ESE behaves as he sees fit in the on-going situation. ESE begins to feel tired of having to convince his negativist ESI friend that everything will be alright, more so that ESI doesn't easily accept his persuasions, since he is awaiting for Te+Ni argumentation of his dual which the ESE cannot provide. Meanwhile ESI doesn't feel comfortable to be always exposed to public, as the ESE draws him out into uncomfortable for him atmosphere. ESI also finds fault with the superficial, as it seems to him, and short-sighted approach to life of his friend.

Time passes and these grievances are forgotten. New meeting brings new joy into their lives. So many stories need to be told, so many news need to be exchanged, so many questions asked. Both of them await to hear each other's advice concerning each other's stories.

-- from VK discussions: https://vk.com/topic-38580757_26674174